Creating Harmony and Independence at Home: Start With One Simple Routine
Tidy Up Routine
Have you ever wondered whether your child could gain more independence, self-worth, and problem-solving skills while also fostering concentration and harmony in your home environment?
After working with many families and children over the years, one thing has become very clear:
Children LOVE gaining responsibilities.
They thrive when there are consistent routines, clear expectations, and simple limits they can understand and participate in.
Do you want to help your child become more engaged in daily routines -
such as getting dressed, brushing teeth, leaving the house without stress, tidying after meals or play - with more flow and cooperation?
Do you want your child to develop a healthy sense of agency and responsibility at home?
Below, you’ll find a practical example to help you get started. Free download available here.
A Common Challenge: Tidying Up Toys
One of the most frequent challenges families share with me is the “tidy-up routine.”
Here’s a simple, effective approach you can start using today.
Scenario
Toys are scattered all over the floor.
You say, “Please tidy up,” and your child…
walks away,
lies down on the floor,
ignores the request, or
simply refuses.
This is very common.
It doesn’t mean your child is “misbehaving.”
More often, the task feels too big, too vague, or too overwhelming.
Instead, try this:
1. Sit with your child and begin the routine together
Rather than giving a verbal command like,
“Can you tidy up, please?”
(which can feel like a huge responsibility for a young child),
invite them into the routine by modelling what to do.
Sit down calmly near the toys
Start singing a simple tidy-up song
“Now it’s time to tidy up, tidy up, tidy up…”Slowly pick up a couple of items yourself
This approach gently draws the child in without pressure.
They see how to begin and feel supported.
2. Offer a simple choice
After about a minute, ask:
“Which ones shall I tidy up, and which ones are you going to do?”
This gives your child:
a sense of agency
a clear task they can handle
predictable boundaries
At first, they may only pick up one or two items—this is perfectly fine.
What matters is that they are:
participating
taking small steps of responsibility
building the foundation of the routine
3. Repeat the same routine next time
Consistency is what turns cooperation into a habit.
Every time you tidy up together:
Sit down
Sing the song
Model by picking up a few items
Offer the same choice
Repetition creates familiarity—and familiarity creates confidence.
4. Add a playful challenge once the routine becomes familiar
When your child begins to understand and follow the routine, add a gentle challenge:
“Let’s count how many we each do. I’ll do 10, and you do 5.”
“This time, you choose which toys are yours to tidy.”
Keep it light, fun, and collaborative—not competitive.
Over many repetitions (often around 10 consistent cycles), you’ll notice:
your child chooses more items
they need less prompting
they start taking pride in their tidy-up work
your presence becomes less necessary
Eventually, the tidy-up routine becomes a habit—
and your child will begin tidying independently.
Download Your Free Tidy-Up Routine here.
If you’d like support with other daily routines—
snack time, meal time, bedtime, bath time, school preparation, getting dressed, or creating calmer transitions—
feel free to reach out at hello@askmissfavalli.com.
Together, we can transform small moments into meaningful independence.
Warmly,
Miss Favalli
“How does Montessori prepare the child for the real world?”
Montessori Vs. The Real World
My work as a teacher began in mainstream schools, and later I trained as a Montessori educator (AMI Diploma). Over the years working in an alternative school, one of the most frequent questions I heard from both prospective and current parents was: “How does Montessori prepare the child for the real world?
Many families have chosen to withdraw their children from alternative education systems, worried that they might not meet the expectations of the “real world.”
If you’re a parent or simply someone curious about education, perhaps you’ve asked yourself the same question.
These conversations with parents, caregivers, teachers, and mentors have often led to deep reflection. Assuming we all share a common goal - to give children the tools to thrive and live to their fullest potential - let’s take a closer look at what this question really means.
What Do We Mean by “The Real World”?
The “real world” is often imagined as a place of competition, grades, and achievement — where success means scoring high, outperforming others, and being the best. It’s a world where resilience is sometimes equated with toughness rather than emotional intelligence or adaptability.
But what does child development research actually say about what helps children flourish as adults?
Children need opportunities to:
Develop critical thinking skills to make thoughtful decisions;
Cultivate social competence and build lasting relationships;
Learn to prioritise and manage their time effectively;
Nurture empathy and self-awareness, caring for themselves, others, and the world;
Find joy and meaning in what they do- a key ingredient in lifelong wellbeing.
Research supports these ideas. The OECD Learning Compass 2030 identifies agency, emotional intelligence, and collaboration as central to children’s future success. Similarly, Harvard’s Center on the Developing Child highlights that executive function and social-emotional skills are foundational for lifelong learning and adaptability.
What Happens in Mainstream Schooling
Mainstream education often focuses on training children to perform well in tests. Unfortunately, this can take away the joy of learning, replacing curiosity with fear of failure. Standardised testing, introduced as early as Year 1, exposes children to daily routines of pressure and comparison.
When asked what they enjoy most about school, children most often reply: “Seeing my friends.” Studies such as The Children’s Society’s Good Childhood Report show that social connection is the strongest contributor to school satisfaction, far more than academic performance.
Furthermore, age-segregated classrooms limit children’s opportunities for social diversity, peer mentoring, and leadership within a community.
What Happens in Montessori Education
In a Montessori environment, children keep their own learning journals where they record what they’ve worked on, what they’d like to explore next, and where they feel they can improve. Learning is both collaborative and individualised.
There are no traditional tests; instead, the teacher guides the child in identifying errors as opportunities for growth. Success is not measured by scores but by the child’s growing confidence, self-direction, and love of learning.
This approach nurtures intrinsic motivation - learning for the joy of learning - which research shows is key to long-term achievement. Studies based on Self-Determination Theory (Deci & Ryan, University of Rochester) demonstrate that autonomy, competence, and connection are the strongest predictors of lasting motivation and well-being.
The Common Concern: Coping with the “Real World”
This is where the big question arises:
How does a child who hasn’t been exposed to the stress of testing cope in the so-called “real world,” where the most successful are often seen as the winners?
Will these children struggle in competitive environments or when asked to complete timed assessments?
Let’s turn to what research tells us. Studies in developmental psychology and education consistently show that intrinsic motivation, emotional regulation, and social-emotional skills, not test scores, are stronger predictors of adult success and wellbeing.
Children who grow up in environments that support autonomy, self-reflection, and purpose-driven learning are often better equipped to handle challenges, adapt to change, and sustain motivation in adulthood.
This is supported by economist James Heckman’s research on noncognitive skills and life outcomes, showing that emotional and social development predict success more reliably than IQ or grades.
Final Thoughts
So, does Montessori prepare children for the real world?
It does, but not by mimicking its pressures. It prepares them by building the very qualities that help humans thrive within it: adaptability, curiosity, confidence, empathy, and purpose.
What do you think?
I’d love to hear your reflections, share your thoughts, send me an email at hello@askmissfavalli.com.
Warmly,
Miss Favalli